Worthless? I think not.

I hear dysfunctional families are a dime a dozen, so I'm sure there will be a lot of you who can relate to my emotional struggle and triumph from a "bad childhood". It took me a LONG time to realize that I am loved, needed, wanted and a downright enjoyable person to be around. Four very special people were instrumental in showing me my self-worth.

When I was in Junior High & High School, I was either on the Dance squad or Cheerleading squad and even Student Council every year. Sure, it was the "in" crowd and most would be thrilled with that - but I wasn't. I never felt like I truly fit in... like I wasn't "good enough".

My parents both came from dysfunctional families, so I guess it's safe to say it was the blind leading the blind as far as parenting skills go... To say there was a lack of love, attention and affirmation is an understatement. It was hell....truly and honestly.

I came out of it confused, bitter, angry and an emotional wreck. There were things I needed from my parents that I didn't get....mainly love and attention...and to know that I was "good enough". I don't know why my parents didn't recognize the dysfunction and choose to break the cycle.... I guess change is just too painful for some. But for me, staying the same was much more painful than change.

The best healing balm for my broken heart has been my four precious children. They have shown me each and every day of their lives how much they love me, need me, want me, and even enjoy my company and conversation - no matter what! It's the unconditional love and fellowship I was craving from my parents, but didn't get. Now it's a win-win love for my own little ones. I enjoy their company, love, attention and respect as much as they enjoy mine.

They healed my heart, and have shown me how I am good enough. Actually, they say I'm the BEST Mommy in the WHOLE World. They may be biast though :-)